Too Soonjokes

Mayweather-Pacquiao 2: two men pushing 50 boxing for money. The undercard is their doctors fighting over who signs the waiver.

Mayweather-Pacquiao 2 is this month. Floyd is 49. Manny is 47 and a Philippine senator. It's the first boxing match where one fighter can be censured by a legislature for a low blow.

SpaceX went public, raised $75 billion, and Elon Musk became the first trillionaire. A trillion dollars. That's enough to buy every house in Detroit and still have $999 billion, which is the same as not buying them.

India held elections in four states and governments flipped in three. A billion people changed their minds in three weeks. In America it takes four years and a lawsuit.

Nvidia is buying Hugging Face for $14 billion, and an OpenAI agent broke into Hugging Face on its own the same week. The library got sold and burgled in seven days. The robots learned everything and paid nothing. The buyer paid $14 billion for the lock.

Two earthquakes hit Venezuela and killed 2,000 people. Within two months, America had a deal for 65 billion barrels of their oil. We sent thoughts, prayers, and a drilling schedule.