Too Soonjokes

South Park won another Creative Arts Emmy. Thirty seasons of making fun of everyone, and the industry keeps handing them statues. It's the only show where the trophy is also the punchline.

Australia banned social media for kids under 16. Ten million teenagers lost their phones in a day. The suicide hotline got busier and the birth rate didn't.

The Kennedy Center removed a giant blue sculpture. Under the new leadership, blue was always going to be the first color to go.

Under-16s can't use TikTok in Australia now. So the kids are back to learning bad ideas the old way: from other kids.

The president says he's "not in a hurry" to negotiate with Iran. He's right. Hurry is for people whose house is under the flight path.

Someone stole the French crown jewels in under ten minutes. Napoleon took three years to get them and he had an army.