Too Soonjokes

Norway's wealth fund is pulling $80 billion out of U.S. Treasuries. A country of five million that runs on fish and oil just told a country of 340 million it doesn't trust the paperwork. The paperwork is the dollar.

Iran is telling all ships in the Gulf "not to be deceived" by the US Navy. The US Navy has 11 aircraft carriers. It's hard to be deceived by something you can see from space.

Labor Day's over and 30 million people found out their vacation days don't roll over. Neither do they, apparently.

Fifty percent tariffs on Canada. Mark Carney retaliated, politely. Canada's tariff list includes bourbon, motorcycles, and Florida oranges. So they're hitting Kentucky, Wisconsin, and Florida. It's the most targeted thing Canada's done since the 1972 Summit Series, and this time the puck is a tax.

Bad Bunny did the halftime show in Spanish. Forty million Americans discovered they could be angry at a language for 13 minutes and still know every word by the end.

The Dodgers won back-to-back titles with a $400 million roster. In baseball, the pennant costs more than the stadium, and the fans pay for both.