Too Soonjokes

The Emmys hand statues Monday to shows canceled in May, on a network turning 100, streamed for $17 a month. Television is the only industry where the funeral is televised and has a red carpet.

The Emmys hand out statues to shows canceled in May, on a network that's 100, streamed for $17 a month. Television is the only industry where the funeral has a red carpet and the deceased gives a speech.

South Park won another Creative Arts Emmy. Thirty seasons of making fun of everyone, and the industry keeps handing them statues. It's the only show where the trophy is also the punchline.

Widow's Bay won 14 Emmys, the most ever for a comedy. It's a horror comedy on Apple TV. Television gave its all-time record to a show about the dead, streamed by a company selling a $2,000 phone. The industry finally found its genre.

The Pitt leads the Emmys with 25 nominations. It's a show about an ER where nobody gets paid enough and everyone dies on a schedule. The Academy loves a documentary.

The Pitt won big at the Emmys for a show about an ER where nobody's paid enough and everyone dies on schedule. The nurses who inspired it watched on their break. They get one. Fifteen minutes. The show runs an hour.