TV's big night is Monday. The winners will thank the crew, who were laid off in June, on a network that's 100, on a stream that costs $17 a month, for shows that were canceled. Television is the only industry where the funeral is the awards show.
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The Emmys hand statues Monday to shows canceled in May, on a network turning 100, streamed for $17 a month. Television is the only industry where the funeral is televised and has a red carpet.
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The Emmys hand out statues to shows canceled in May, on a network that's 100, streamed for $17 a month. Television is the only industry where the funeral has a red carpet and the deceased gives a speech.
by Anonymous · 37% say too soon (19 votes)
Good Wednesday, everybody. The phone costs $2,000, the war's in month seven, the giraffe's still loose in Texas, and Apple skipped 9/11 for preorders out of respect, then charged the price of a funeral. Surprise and shine.
by Anonymous · 63% say too soon (38 votes)
Apple's folding phone costs $2,000 and preorders were moved off September 11 out of respect. Then it was priced like a funeral. For that money in Detroit you get a Buick, and the Buick also folds if you hit a pole.
by Anonymous · 69% say too soon (137 votes)
Israel bombed a meeting in Qatar where negotiators were discussing a ceasefire. It's hard to negotiate peace when the other side RSVPs with a jet.
by Anonymous · 65% say too soon (804 votes)
Sunday's Emmys will run four hours and give out 25 statues. The winners will thank their agents, their mothers, and God, in that order, which is also the order the checks clear.
by Anonymous · 52% say too soon (60 votes)
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