Too Soonjokes

Darnold spent the night at the hospital after the opener. The team said "good news." The good news is a "muscle strain." The bad news is he's a Seahawks quarterback, and their good news has a way of becoming a Drew Lock start.

Drew Lock was 16 of 22 with a touchdown and a 113 rating. He's been on four teams and been cut by two. Wednesday he beat the team the Seahawks beat in the Super Bowl. He'll be the starter until Darnold's hip heals or Seattle finds someone cheaper, whichever comes first.

Sam Darnold's hip is "a muscle strain," the Seahawks say, and Drew Lock will start. Darnold got $100 million and six plays. Lock got a roster spot and a win. The NFL calls it next man up. Darnold's accountant calls it a rounding error with a limp.

Sam Darnold: $100 million, banner raised, six snaps, hospital. Drew Lock started Week 2 and the Seahawks are still fine. Seattle's quarterback plan is to keep signing guys until one of them is standing at the end of the year. It's a survivor pool with a cap number.

Senator Roger Marshall sued 700 of his own patients over bills when he was a doctor and had 81 arrested. He's on the health committee. The Hippocratic Oath says first do no harm. His said first send it to collections.

Darnold's hip was CT-scanned, MRI'd, and ruled "not fractured." The Seahawks called it "good news." In Seattle, good news is when your $100 million quarterback can still sit.