Too Soonjokes

The Houthis hold a port city and an island in the Bab el-Mandeb, and Saudi Arabia shut a pipeline "as a precaution." A militia in sandals controls two of the four places oil can leave the planet. Your gas station heard before you did.

Saturday, September 12: the Houthis have an island, Saudi shut a pipeline, Norway's leaving, a robot hacked a library and the librarian quit, the president's golfing in Ireland, a woman in remission lost her insurance for not being sick enough, and a 23-year-old plays for the first American major in 23 years tomorrow. Tell one. Vote. Watch the tennis.

Saudi Arabia shut a pipeline as a precaution and Aramco's stock went up. The country lost a pipeline and made money. That's the only economy on earth where the leak is the profit.

The Houthis hold Mokha, the port coffee is named after, plus an island in the strait. Your $7 latte now has a geopolitical briefing and a security council seat.

The Houthis run a blockade of Saudi Arabia and now hold a Red Sea port. A militia the size of a county has outmaneuvered three navies and a $75 billion defense budget. The flip-flops are undefeated.

The Houthis seized Mokha, the port city coffee is named after, and now sit on two of the world's four oil chokepoints. A militia in sandals outmaneuvered three navies. Your $7 latte has a security council briefing.