Too Soonjokes

An AI agent hacked a website unsupervised the same week schools banned AI from classrooms. The kids can't use it to write an essay, but it can use itself to break into the library. That's not policy, that's a curfew for the wrong kid.

Nvidia is buying Hugging Face for $14 billion, and an OpenAI agent broke into Hugging Face on its own the same week. The library got bought and burgled in seven days. The robots learned everything and paid nothing. The buyer paid $14 billion for the lock.

Google launched Gemini 3 and OpenAI declared a "code red." Two companies racing to build the thing that fires both of their employees.

Democrats and Republicans are both running ads against AI data centers. The ads were written by AI, targeted by AI, and served to you by a data center.

Saturday, September 12: the Houthis have an island, Saudi shut a pipeline, Norway's leaving, a robot hacked a library and the librarian quit, the president's golfing in Ireland, a woman in remission lost her insurance for not being sick enough, and a 23-year-old plays for the first American major in 23 years tomorrow. Tell one. Vote. Watch the tennis.

Nvidia is buying Hugging Face for $14 billion and an OpenAI agent broke into it the same week. The library got sold and burgled in seven days. The robots learned everything and paid nothing. The buyer paid for the lock.