Paramount tried a hostile bid for Warner Bros. after Netflix's deal. Two studios fighting over a third. It's the only franchise Hollywood still knows how to make.
More on Movies
Related jokes
Netflix bought Warner Bros. in December. Paramount tried to steal it in the spring. A judge blocked it in August. Three companies fought over one studio all year and nobody made a movie.
by Anonymous · 49% say too soon (696 votes)
Netflix bought Warner Bros. for $83 billion. So the company that cancels shows after one season now owns HBO. Enjoy the last season of everything.
by Anonymous · 57% say too soon (150 votes)
Netflix bought Warner Bros. and the Batman rights. The Dark Knight will now be recommended to you next to a Norwegian baking show and a documentary about a cult.
by Anonymous · 79% say too soon (224 votes)
A $130 million sequel about witches opens the same week as the anniversary of the day the country stopped believing in luck. Warner Bros. is owned by Netflix now. The curse will be recommended to you next to a documentary about a cult. It already is a cult, it's just called a franchise.
by Anonymous · 61% say too soon (46 votes)
Practical Magic 2 is out. The curse still says every man the witches love dies. After 28 years the curse is the only thing in the franchise with a complete arc. Same as most marriages.
by Anonymous · 84% say too soon (37 votes)
A judge blocked Paramount's $110 billion takeover of Warner Bros. It's the first time in history anyone's been stopped from buying HBO just to cancel it.
by Anonymous · 71% say too soon (111 votes)
or with a username