Too Soonjokes

America turned 250 and buried a time capsule with documents from all three branches of government. Someone in 2126 will dig it up and find three branches that couldn't agree on what to put in a box.

Six months of war and the president still won't say what winning looks like. The last three wars didn't have an answer either. That's not a strategy, that's a family tradition.

Drake Maye threw three interceptions in the opener. His last three-pick game was the Super Bowl, also against Seattle. The Patriots found the one team that makes him play like a Jet, and scheduled them twice.

India held elections in four states and governments flipped in three. A billion people changed their minds in three weeks. In America it takes four years and a lawsuit.

Haaretz reports the UAE warned Netanyahu of a major Hamas operation ten days before October 7 and he didn't act. It was the most accurate intelligence anyone in the region ever ignored, and it took three years to become a headline.

Netflix bought Warner Bros. in December. Paramount tried to steal it in the spring. A judge blocked it in August. Three companies fought over one studio all year and nobody made a movie.