Too Soonjokes

The Supreme Court tossed the White House's mail-voting restrictions four days after a $5,000-if-you-vote-right offer went out on Fox. So the Court says mail your ballot, and the White House says there's a check in the mail if you fill it out correctly. The Post Office is the only branch that has to touch both.

The Supreme Court tossed the mail-voting restrictions the same week a $5,000-if-you-vote-right offer went out on Fox. So the Court says mail your ballot and the White House says there's a check in the mail if you get it right. The Post Office has to touch both.

Tupac's killer was convicted in Las Vegas after 30 years. He'd been telling the story on camera for a decade. Vegas finally found the one guy who didn't understand what happens in Vegas.

A jury finally convicted Duane "Keffe D" Davis for Tupac's murder, thirty years later. He'd confessed on a podcast, in a book, and on YouTube. The man was indicted by his own content strategy.

The man convicted of orchestrating Tupac's murder is the uncle of the shooter, who died in 1998. So the case was solved by everyone else dying first. That's the Vegas method.

They tore down the East Wing for a ballroom and the Supreme Court said fine. So the building has a dance floor now and no First Lady's office. That's a divorce settlement, not a renovation.