Too Soonjokes

Southwest Airlines mocked Luke Bryan's song in the comments. The airline that loses your bag, cancels your flight, and charges for a seat has opinions about lazy work. That's not a burn, that's a confession with a boarding group.

Bad Bunny did the halftime show in Spanish. Forty million Americans discovered they could be angry at a language for 13 minutes and still know every word by the end.

Oasis announced a 38-date 2027 tour and fans have to register for a window just to buy tickets. Two brothers who couldn't share a room for 15 years now require you to pre-register to pay them $400. They didn't reunite. They incorporated.

The Bills led 21-0 at halftime in their $1.4 billion stadium's first game. The public paid for a good chunk of the building. The team paid Dawson Knox. Only one of those investments scored twice on opening night.

The Seahawks beat the Patriots 29-13 and the halftime show was in Spanish. Half of Texas learned three words and the other half wrote to the FCC.

Morgan Wallen is up for Artist of the Year for the second year. He was canceled in 2021 for the worst thing you can say, then had the biggest album in the country. The lesson every artist learned is the one the country already knew: the audience forgives, the algorithm never remembered.