This Congress holds the record for the longest shutdown in history and they're all up for re-election. Democracy is a dog that keeps eating the chocolate.
More on Congress, Elections and voting
Related jokes
Longest shutdown in history. Air traffic controllers worked for free while Congress debated whose fault it was, from an airport lounge, on a flight that was late.
by Anonymous · 78% say too soon (158 votes)
The shutdown closed national parks, so people just walked in. Turns out the Grand Canyon works without a ranger. So does Congress, and that's the problem.
by Anonymous · 35% say too soon (186 votes)
A super PAC is spending $10 million to help Ken Paxton win the Texas Senate seat. Ten million dollars for a man who was impeached by his own party and acquitted by the same one. Texas doesn't have elections, it has re-enactments.
by Anonymous · 42% say too soon (83 votes)
Madonna leads the VMAs at 68. MTV hasn't played a video since 2008. The product's dead and the ceremony continues, which is the plan for the census, the Senate, and most marriages.
by Anonymous · 33% say too soon (45 votes)
Nobody's seen Iran's Supreme Leader in months, nobody likes Congress, and the Brewers are in the World Series. 2026: the year everyone's invisible except Milwaukee.
by Anonymous · 66% say too soon (2521 votes)
Election is Nov 3. The World Series ends around Halloween. Which means for one week America gets to watch two teams no one cares about and two parties no one likes.
by Anonymous · 49% say too soon (1649 votes)
or with a username