Too Soonjokes

An airstrike on Doha during peace talks. The Middle East is the only place where the mediator needs a bunker.

The administration also wants to strip Ilhan Omar of her citizenship. Most dramatic "go back where you came from" in history: hiring lawyers.

Italy sent 500 troops to Milan over cost-of-living protests. When a plate of pasta costs a mortgage payment, you're going to need the army.

Trump says the war is "3 to 4 weeks away" from ending, but also the threat could be wiped out "in one night." So somewhere between a long weekend and a Netflix limited series.

The U.S. is deporting people to third countries they've never been to. It's like a cruise where the excursion is your whole life.

The Trump–Xi state dinner was packed with tech billionaires. Most expensive dinner ever where everybody still split the check with a TikTok.